Things were going so well. I was feeling tired, but resolved. I had a plan to keep myself awake. I was enjoying having the extra time.
Then this morning, I had my first nap around 5am, and woke up at 10:20am. Unlike other breakdowns, I don’t even know what happened. I have no memory of setting or forgetting to set my alarm, though I find it hard to believe that I would forget something so intrinsic to the process. I have no memory of the alarm going off, and doing something silly like going back to bed.
Basically, all I can conclude is that my own brain has sabotaged my memory in order to guarantee a significant amount of sleep.
I don’t have it in me to start all over again. I’m pretty pissed off; it’s one thing to be faced with a conscious lack of determination, but quite another to discover that said lack is so inbuilt, your own body will conceal it from you and manipulate your senses when necessary.
Upon reflection, having been through this once, I would definitely consider trying it again if there was a significant need. In particular, I think of my friends who have new babies; being able to get by on naps, at least until the baby can sleep through the night, would be extremely helpful. Just approaching the sleep deprivation in a consistent way might be preferable to the torture new parents seem to undergo.
#1 by Aulia - February 20th, 2015 at 20:03
I feel your pain – I’m the same way. For years, I was able to get away with this, due to not having an early-morning schulede. Now, however (and since October of last year, actually,) I have to be at work (35 minutes away) at 8am.More than 3 months later, I still cannot find my way to bed earlier than 11pm, which just doesn’t give me enough time to relax, fall asleep and wake up refreshed at 6:30am.Some of us just aren’t wired for this Morning Stuff, man. 😉 Nightimes can be SOOOO productive!