There are correlations
between how far you have fallen in love
and how many cars will try to hit her
between the frequency with which you check your phone
and the number of bears in the woods where she walks her dog
between how primal is your lovemaking
and how steadfast are her stalkers
between the clarity of her face on your closed eyes
and the likelihood her basement wiring is faulty
So when our passion faded
it was replaced with the relief
that you
would be
finally
safe
But still today
there are moments
that clutch me by the heart
when I fear just a little for your life
#1 by Steph Sook - December 13th, 2007 at 13:58
She doesnt have a dog anymore. I dont get the part about cars hitting her, like when we go for runs? And what basement wiring?
#2 by yoursinwriting - December 13th, 2007 at 15:00
(I think this is why poets don’t have question periods after readings.)
#3 by Steph Sook - December 13th, 2007 at 19:35
Im sorry Josh! Its a really good poem! Im just not the best at interpreting them. You are the best poet that i know (in real life)
#4 by yoursinwriting - December 13th, 2007 at 21:04
No need to apologize! I was just teasing. And your reaction is just generally true of poetry– what the poet thinks they are saying is not always what is understood to have been said, and I actually think that’s a good thing for art and imagination.
#5 by steph sook - December 14th, 2007 at 02:20
i get it now
#6 by mom - January 4th, 2008 at 09:47
I loved this poem but not being a poet myself I wonder if the last 2 stanzas should have read " she would finally be safe" and " for her life". It really encompasses how love and hate are such close emotions. As the saying goes "it is easier to hate the one you love" or some such!
#7 by yoursinwriting - January 4th, 2008 at 12:46
A couple of people are getting "love and hate" from this piece. I’m curious why, because that certainly wasn’t the intent.
#8 by Anonymous - January 4th, 2008 at 23:53
OK. Well I took the first sentence of every stanza as your feeling (being a man) and then the second stanza as how you felt about her. Almost like wishing something bad would happen because of bad feelings. Please help me out here. Or in the 2nd last part….almost like you were the reason she wasn’t safe???
#9 by yoursinwriting - January 5th, 2008 at 00:04
Awesome… thanks for that feedback. Actually, my experience is that when you care about someone, you are always worrying– not wishing– that something bad will happen to them. The correlation is between how much you love and how much you worry, even about dangers that are unreasonable. When you don’t love someone, you don’t worry about them, so when love goes, the worry goes, and all that is left is safety. The kicker is that there are moments when I remember the love, and the worry crops up again.
See? All love, all the time.