Now I Hate The Bank of Montreal, Too

Today I went to withdraw some cash from the Bank of Montreal near my apartment. In a society gone mad with "convenience fees," this was the only bank in town that I knew of that still allowed me the privilege of getting my money for free.

But not today:
Oh boy. So I go over to the financial services counter to find out what's up. There is a peon sitting behind the desk, and a bankhead in trendy clothes and heels leaning over the counter discussing something with her. I stood nearby, and when they finished talking, tried to get an answer to a simple question.

Me:

Excuse me?

Bankhead In Trendy Clothes and Heels (BITCH):

(walking away, looking back over her shoulder) Mm-hmm?

Me:

I've been withdrawing money here for months, and today your machine is trying to charge me a convenience fee because I'm with another bank. I'm wondering when that started?

BITCH:

Oh, what bank are you with?

Me:

A Credit Union.

BITCH:

Oh, gosh, well we've always charged a convenience fee, haven't we (condescending tone, looking at peon)?

Peon:

Yes, master.

Me:

Actually, that's not true. I've been using your machines for months now, without any fees. Something must have changed recently, I just want to know when it changed, and maybe why.

BITCH:

You must've been getting charged for it, we've always charged for it, haven't we (looking at peon)?

Peon:

Yes. Yes. Please don't hit me.

BITCH:

You should go look at your statements. The fee is probably showing up on your statement, because we've always charged a fee.

Me:

It's not on my statements. I update my accounts online every month, and I know it's not on my statement. If I withdraw $60, the statement says $60, not $61.50. Besides, you can't charge me unless you ask me on the screen, right?

BITCH:

(scowl)

Me:

And the reason I'm talking to you now is that this is the first time I've been asked about a fee.

BITCH:

(through clenched smile) Well, I guess you've just been lucky then.

Ed's Note: Seriously, that's what she said. Lucky.

Me:

What?

BITCH:

You must have been lucky. Alright then? Goodbye! (turns and walks to the back-office doors)

Me:

(shouting to BITCH as she departs) Are you kidding?!? That doesn't make any sense! It's a computer! There's no lucky!

BITCH:

(clacking of Heels, closing of doors, sliding of steel bolts)

Peon:

Have a nice day!

I would have written a complaint to customer service, but I suppose I'm not officially a customer (gee, wonder why). Still, would it have killed her to just say she didn't know?