Never Trust a Pigeon

Heard a goose honking around my apartment today. In fact, I heard it loudly and often enough that I went to my balcony to check it out.

I currently have a pigeon problem, which is that these two pigeons keep trying to roost over my balcony storage locker, and I keep trying to shoo them away. They have more time and determination, so the result is that my balcony is covered in pigeon crap.

Approaching my balcony door, I could see one little pigeon tucked coyly under the lower balcony railing, and there, perched on the top of the railing, was a huge Canada goose. I had a moment of cognitive dissonance; I couldn’t actually be seeing this, could I?

I ripped back the glass door and screamed something incoherent at both birds, in a tone utterly defeated.

Now I had goose crap on my balcony as well. I wondered why in the hell would a goose choose to land on my balcony, of all the possible pads in Calgary? It’s gotta be the pigeons. They’re notorious gossips.


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