The Key to Comedy: Timing

Also, Perceived Tragedy

Growing up, I can remember my dad saying on more than one occasion that every time he came into some extra cash, some expense, often unforeseen, would appear that was almost that exact amount. I rarely came into extra cash as a youth, and my emergency expenses were always my parents’, so this week has been a great confirmation that I am indeed becoming my father.

In our recent contract settlement, Alberta teachers received a one-time lump sum payment of $1500. Fantastic.

So Calgary has been getting really warm lately, and I can almost feel my winter tires melting on the pavement. I called my mechanic and scheduled to buy new summer tires and have them swapped.

“Are you sure?” he said.


“Seriously… are you sure?

It had been in the high teens on and off for a couple of weeks. June is around the corner. Of course I’m sure.

I drop my car off for the tires, a tune-up and road test. It’s over 15°C. Everything’s on track. The next day I get a call from the mechanic. The tune-up was great, and the car is in incredible condition, except that I need brake shoes to go with my tires. The total damage now? $1271.

The insult adding to that financial injury is that I picked up the car yesterday, and the weather today? An unpredicted 20cm of snow.

Heee-larious! And my run on Sunday is calling for rain. You can bet that the winner of the draw will have donated $100, and I will run in more than 25 minutes

Ed’s Note: Guaranteed.

which will mean that of my original $1500 windfall, I will have $29.

That should buy just enough alcohol to help me forget this ever happened.

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