Lots of folks have asked me how the run went. I know this is just out of politeness, but I thought I'd wrap up what happened.

At the 1km mark, I noticed that I had run for 5:30, which would be way too slow to finish under 25 minutes. So I tried plan B: sprint for 30 seconds, then jog very slowly for 1 minute, then repeat. Plan B is also known as "a very stupid idea." After three minutes of this nonsense, I gave up and went back to just jogging slowly.

At about the 3.5km mark, I was ready to just walk for a bit, when I was passed
by a pair of cute girls with very nice butts. Their butts fell directly into my visual range, what with my head tilted pathetically toward the asphalt and all. My spirits were now buoyed, and I drafted in this fine view for the remainder of the race.

It turns out that my published race time (29:16) was the GUN race time, not my CHIP race time. My chip race time was actually 27:56, and I finished 33rd out of 176 runners in my age category. Stats like that start giving me the crazy idea that if I trained, I might be able to come first in my group. How hard could it be? Heck, I'm already in the top 20%!
When I crossed the finish line, I scooped up my free swag (juices, fruit, water, yogurt tubes, etc.), and headed straight for the free massage tent-- it almost makes running worthwhile-- but after a great 10 minute rub-down, the poor massage therapist-in-training had to wipe my sweat off the table. I forgot that your body keeps sweating after you stop running. Seems like a design flaw to me.

Then I jumped on the C-Train for the gruelling 3 minute ride home. By that time I was feeling great and wondering why I hadn't run harder...

...well, there's always the Breast Cancer run in the fall!

Thanks to everybody who so graciously contributed to my run fundraising efforts.

Click on the video below to watch the Official Draw Results.

This year's Mother's Day Run was a great event, and the turnout was over 14,000 runners, walkers, and wheelchair racers. I know you don't really give a shit about this-- what you really care about is Where's My Money?!?

Yes, of course. The money.

So the completely unsurprising news is that I didn't even come close to running the 5K in 25 minutes.
Which means that somebody is going to win DOUBLE their money back! Yay!

Again, THANK YOU to all the folks who ponied up-- at the end of the day, we'll have raised over $1,100!!! I say "at the end of the day" because a couple of stragglers are coughing up their dough this week, so I will be putting off the draw until next weekend as promised in my last email.

Thanks again, and stay tuned for the draw results!

Growing up, I can remember my dad saying on more than one occasion that every time he came into some extra cash, some expense, often unforeseen, would appear that was almost that exact amount. I rarely came into extra cash as a youth, and my emergency expenses were always my parents', so this week has been a great confirmation that I am indeed becoming my father.

In our recent contract settlement, Alberta teachers received a one-time lump sum payment of $1500. Fantastic.

So Calgary has been getting really warm lately, and I can almost feel my winter tires melting on the pavement. I called my mechanic and scheduled to buy new summer tires and have them swapped.

"Are you sure?" he said.

"Yep."

"Seriously... are you sure?"

It had been in the high teens on and off for a couple of weeks. June is around the corner. Of course I'm sure.

I drop my car off for the tires, a tune-up and road test. It's over 15°C. Everything's on track. The next day I get a call from the mechanic. The tune-up was great, and the car is in incredible condition, except that I need brake shoes to go with my tires. The total damage now? $1271.

The insult adding to that financial injury is that I picked up the car yesterday, and the weather today? An unpredicted 20cm of snow.

Heee-larious! And my run on Sunday is calling for rain. You can bet that the winner of the draw will have donated $100, and I will run in more than 25 minutes
which will mean that of my original $1500 windfall, I will have $29.

That should buy just enough alcohol to help me forget this ever happened.

It was sheer optimism that led me to solicit donations this year, and you guys didn't let me down. My original goal of $150 was shattered by your generosity, and I am truly grateful. I will sweat on your behalf.

I've raised my goal to $250, and my students are even donating their pop machine change. If anyone would like to contribute (anything you can-- it adds up!), you can still donate here:

Support me in the Run for the Cure!