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Christmas Mispackings
Posted by yoursinwriting in Everything Else on December 30th, 2005
I left for the airport carrying many large and various items in a thick paper Old Navy bag with handles. I thought it would work. I hoped it would hold. I prayed it would survive the trip.
Ed’s Note: Say it with me: “foreshadowing.”
Christmas Misspeakings
Posted by yoursinwriting in Everything Else on December 29th, 2005
Over the holidays, I was lucky enough to be able to visit my good friend Ian, and his wife Andrea, at their newly-improved home. During the guided tour, we exited the kitchen into the front hall, I saw this cool little lay-down-couch-thing beside a table with a phone. Called a “chaise lounge,” it appealed to the geek in me for its efficient use of space, and convenient access to both remove one’s shoes or recline during a phone call. Then it all went bad.
Survival in Print
Posted by yoursinwriting in Everything Else on November 30th, 2005
Newspapers are undergoing a serious risk to their survival. Consider that more and more people get their news online; ad and subscription revenue will decrease directly with decreasing print circulations, and reach a tipping point unless the media outlets can find a better way to leverage their online products.
Maybe a Fig Leaf Would Help
Posted by yoursinwriting in Everything Else on November 21st, 2005
The female research lead, referring to Michelangelo’s David, claims that “Men of 35 to 40 years of age … are attracted by the extraordinary masculine beauty and at the same time, are also agitated.” Perhaps this is some kind of homo-erotic insinuation; if anything, one look at David’s penis should make anybody feel more confident about their luggage: that thing’s tiny.
Fewer Mistakes = Less Confusion
Posted by yoursinwriting in Everything Else on November 19th, 2005
The media is starting to sound like a bunch of four year olds. Over the past few years, I’ve noticed an alarming increase in the number of times people use the word “less” when what they mean is “fewer.” In conversation, in articles, and even recently, in marketing slogans. It sounds ridiculous, especially coming from the mouths of educated CBC radio personalities who speak for a living.
Look Out Nintendo: Ninjas vs. Pirates!
Posted by yoursinwriting in Everything Else on November 10th, 2005
My computer science class is starting a unit on video game design. They are using a freeware program called GameMaker that frees them from all the background programming details. After two units of real programming, they are vibrating with excitement. Yesterday we played a bunch of GameMaker-designed games so they could get a feel for what’s possible. Today I had them write down a basic outline of a game they would design. Here are my two favourites.
You Are What (Defect) You Eat
Posted by yoursinwriting in Everything Else on October 29th, 2005
I’ll never forget the time my sister and I split a huge package of Whachamacallit chocolate bars, my favourite at the time. I tucked into the first one, and noticed it tasted strange; not exactly stale, but really, really close. After my second bite, a big chunk fell away from the bar. Upon closer inspection, it turned out to be the dried corpse of a moth, balled up in spiderwebs. I was too stunned to feel sick. And to be fair, I was too young to be that picky where free chocolate was involved.
Fast forward to a few days ago, when I found this page, which outlines the levels of “defect” that, if discovered, require action by the American Food and Drug Association.
Land of the Coerced, and the Home of the Slave
Posted by yoursinwriting in Everything Else on October 23rd, 2005
The movie Operation Dreamland is a documentary of the lives of soldiers in Fallujah. The link above will take you the trailers page; at the bottom, watch the “Recruiting” video, which roiled me enough to make this post. A pair of commanding officers mock and demean their soldiers, who have already served their country, in an effort to get them to stay on for another tour of duty.
I can appreciate the position the American military is in, but I wish they wouldn’t shame their surviving soldiers with statments like. “You can’t go home and live with momma; she’s not gonna put up with you anymore.”
Bush’s Genius Stupidity
Posted by yoursinwriting in Everything Else on October 20th, 2005
http://www.xroadsfilms.com/batescomedycentral/
My God Comes in Marinara
Posted by yoursinwriting in Everything Else on October 14th, 2005
In Kansas, a group of religious nutbars on the Education Board are trying to use their voting majority to destroy the basis of Science in that state. In case you haven’t heard, there is a growing push to introduce creationism, rebranded as Intelligent Design (ID), into the Science curriculum. You heard right: Science.
Then in steps a brilliant, funny, and expanding group of people fed up with ID who have put forth their own theory of how we all got here: the Flying Spaghetti Monster (FSM).
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