Episode II: The Appliance Strikes Back

The clock came on, but it was off by a couple of hours. I intuitively pushed the “Clock” button, but nothing happened. Hm. Maybe I was doing this wrong. I got out the manual and looked up how to set the time. Step 1: Push the “Clock” button. I pushed the “Clock” button again. The display flashed in red: “CONV BAKE: 350 START?” Whoa. That can’t be good. I pushed “Cancel” and it disappeared.

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Manifest Destiny Lite

Once again, here I am ready to write something, and the topic that comes to mind is the new girlfriend. She’s a special model, with all the top-of-the-line sexy, snuggly, healthy, funny, sporty, smarty features you would expect in a high-end female, but none of the judgemental, conceited, neurotic artifacts found in some other premium women with poorer build quality.

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Finally at a Loss for Words

I’ve met an incredible woman. That’s it. The excuse for my lack of posting, the explanation for why my co-workers think I’m looking kinda strange lately.

Ed’s Note: Strange, as in bedraggled, unshaven, with a goofy grin. Like, kinda homeless.

I can’t really put into words what this is like. Not yet. I feel a rush to express it, to experience it in language, but it’s as futile as hurrying Christmas.

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A Month With a Microwave

Like most things I set my mind to, the decision to put off buying a stove is putting a huge cramp in my lifestyle. But on the flip side, as it usually happens when my lifestyle is cramped, I have adapted with only minor discomfort, and a good story. In fact, it’s amazingly easy to live with only a microwave and fridge, as long as you are willing to eat out a lot.

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My Broken Tape Measure

Today I decided to see just how tall I actually am. I have been saying six-foot-two since grade 11, and in university the varsity volleyball team program listed me at six-foot-three.

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My Condo Pre-Walkthrough Walkthrough

So I’ve been sneaking into my condo every week to see it coming along. Last week this is what it looked like.

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Two Days After PRK Laser Eye Surgery

Today started off pretty crappy. When I woke up, I had trouble focussing, and the contact in my left eye felt out of place. Still, I got showered, dressed up a bit in my new pants and belt (which I bought yesterday when I was waiting for my checkup appointment, using my Bay Gift Certificate… thanks Mom!), and went in to work.

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The Day After PRK Laser Eye Surgery

Jesus Saves VisionI was in good hands for my surgery. This is the painting I was talking about yesterday, located in the main greeting room for the company that did my eye surgery. I guess the “Prayer Request” card in my surgery package (where I could ask to have my surgeon, who “believes in the power of prayer,” pray with me personally before the surgery) wasn’t an isolated artifact.

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PRK Laser Eye Surgery Smells Like Burning Hair

This is what I look like before going to bed. Seriously. This is to keep me from rubbing my eyes in my sleep. Which I would definitely do.

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What?!? Look Directly at the Laser?!?

As for safety, my surgeon is apparently a superstar. I googled him, and found a whole bunch of research he is working on, along with a guy who had him as his eye surgeon, and gives the doc a huge thumbs up. About the most disturbing thing I could find about him is a small square of paper in my preparation package with the title “Prayer Request.” It starts “Your surgeon is a Christian and he believes in the power of prayer.” If I check the box, put my name on the line, and hand it in on the day of my surgery, the doctor will take a moment to pray with me for a good outcome. However, the card also says that “Each day [the doctor] personally prays for his patients and he prays for divine guidance as he operates on each patient.” I think that should be enough. After all, if God is looking out for the doc’s performance (and, by association, his malpractice insurance), I’m sure that means I should be fine.

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